Two months ago, exactly, my father passed away after fighting many serious medical issues. From December to April he fought and surpassed all odds of making it as long as he did. Today is Father’s Day, the first that I’ve had to spend without him. Sure we never really went out or did anything special aside from me giving him a gift—usually chocolates that was probably really bad for him—but even not doing that little gesture of giving him a gift and a card weighs down on my heart today.
My father may not have always been there when I wanted or needed him to be and he may have pushed me harder than he should have, but I still love him and miss him dearly. On this day I cannot help but think of all the memories I have of him and though they bring tears to my eyes they also bring happiness. When I was a kid learning to read, I have to admit I wasn’t good at it all, but my Dad fought with me tooth and nail to try to get me to use Hooked-on-Phonics just so I could learn to read. It didn’t really work and I still ended up in a “special” class to help with my reading, but at least he tried, right?
He—along with a very close family friend who also passed away this year—taught me how to play softball. He was so persistent, which I suppose is where I get my persistence from, even after I finished playing a game or finished with a practice he still insisted that I practice some more. One memory that really sticks in my head—one that I shared at his funeral—was one day after practice he wanted me to work on my batting. We were out there for hours, but he had this big smile on his face the entire time, even when I started hitting the ball way out into the outfield where he had to run and get them. And of course, I cannot forget the memory of him walking me down the aisle at my wedding.
No one could ever understand how much it means to me that he was able to do that. He may not be able to see my children, but at least he was able to do that. He was so happy that day, he had a huge smile on his face—as always—and he was so proud. I’ll never forget how he asked me, before we made our way down the aisle, “Are you sure you want to do this? It’s not too late.” I just laughed and said, “Yeah, Dad, I’m sure. Just make sure I don’t fall down these steps.” Before he gave me away to my now husband he kissed my cheek and gave a big, bright smile. His smile is what I think I’ll miss the most.
My father was a great Dad and though he did some things I didn’t like, I still love him and I miss him so much. Today is Father’s Day, go do something nice for your Dad—even if he’s gone remember him and go visit him—I’m sure he’ll like that.
What do you plan to do for your father today? Share a special memory you have of your father.
Posted on June 17, 2012 by Felicia